Thursday, November 07, 2002

The Test

First time here, I shall have to see what this is like. Lets try something safe - sports. I live in Atlanta and love ice hockey. Unfortunately, I live in a city that has the only all female NHL team. Always careful not to hurt anyone, we don't check, we don't intimidate, we don't skate all that well; but we are probably the most popular team in hockey, since most teams on any given night can beat us and not break into a sweat. I love hockey because it is a blend of speed and power, but we have neither ( with the exception of Kovalchuk who has speed, but plays with the recklessness of the teenager that he is). The coach has a bad case of Tourette's syndrome as he cowers behind the bench. The severity of his tics seem directly proportional to the bad performance of his team, hence his face is contorted more than the fellow who consumes bad beer. The general manager always looks as of he has just finished consuming a meal that was more than he should have eaten - satisfied and on the verge of throwing up at the same time. Known for his witty repartee, he has remarked that," we are not where we want to be ", after starting 0-8-1, and that " we may to move some people around". I think I will nick name him "shiny" because of his brilliance.

I am also pretty keen on NASCAR. I attended the race a few weeks ago in Rockingham. I would estimate there were 65,000 people who attended the race, and if the sample around me was accurate, there were approximately 65,000 people, about 150,000 teeth, and at any one time about 40,000 people inhaling and exhaling. I guess it is not called the Winston Cup for nothing. But if you were a crown and bridge man, you would feel positively elated with the economic possibilities after walking through this crowd. No wonder America doesn't eat enough fruits and vegetables, I am not sure how most would masticate fruits and vegetables. White bread may even be a challenge. No wonder Skoal is considered a vegetable in some parts of the south.

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